In order to keep myself sane I have to admit powerlessness over several aspects of my life. The biggest would be drugs and alcohol. Once I take that first drink or drug, I become powerless and won’t stop putting that poison into my body until I am passed out. This would be called my physical allergy, but even before I take the first drink, another phenomenon occurs; the obsession and mental craving. In my heart I know it is a horrible idea, but the part of my brain that is responsible for reasoning and logic has been shut off. Without spiritual help and A.A. meetings, and talking with other alcoholics I am very likely to take that first drink. This is powerlessness. While the average drinker has a couple of beers or a glass of wine every now and then, I am unable to stop drinking on my own, and I won’t stop until I physically can’t put another drink into my body. To me there is a difference in being impulsive and compulsive. There are people who are impulsive with some of the things they do, while their behavior may seem very unique, they do not drink to access. I believe as an addict and alcoholic, I am compulsive. I am powerless over my thoughts and cravings and without spiritual guidance the obsession will not leave until I take the first drink. Along with being powerless over alcohol, if I were to take a drink my life would become unmanageable very quickly. While under the influence, the part of my brain that provides reason, logic, compassion and empathy is shut off. This happens first with mental obsession, but then to a much more extreme when I am drinking and using drugs. Since these are the functions of the brain that make us human, and they have been shut off in mine, which makes me pretty powerless right? So I must accept that I am powerless over any substance and ask my higher power to restore me to sanity one day at a time.
– Current B2B client